Thursday, September 3, 2009

10 more things you can do for women in Pakistan and America

The list of things you can do to help women in Pakistan and Pak-American women is virtually endless. Here are a couple of more ideas.
1. Raise good Muslim sons and daughters
Who raised those men who treat women badly? Mostly women, although of course, societal and cultural customs have their role to play as well. For all the talk of women going out to change the world, we tend to forget about the one place where women have the most control: as mothers. Use this power.
It's mothers who can perpetuate notions of what a woman's place is, and they also can perpetuate a lot of the misguided notions about the position of women. Think through what messages you are giving your children. For example, how many mothers spoil their sons by not insisting they clean up their own room, put away their own dishes after dinner, help clean up the house or fold the laundry? Mothers can and should challenge gender stereotypes in their own homes.
This may be considered a small step for moms, but it leads to big steps in the long run. A boy with such training grows is likely to have a fairer view towards women and is more likely to be sensitive to women's issues be they in Pakistan or America.
With regards to daughters, mothers must orient them in the right direction on a personal level as Muslims, then at the academic and career levels. Don't forget that mothers are their daughters' first role models. Be an example for her of a solid, strong Muslim Pakistani.
2. Speak out against injustice
There are many, many areas where Pakistani women are the victims of injustice. While it will take generations to root out practices that harm women, the least you can do is speak out against such acts. Start off with your family. If you see this behavior on your next visit to Pakistan, be critical but in a wise way. Also, get your husband or father to also speak out, since his word is likely to make a strong impact as well.
Too often, the status quo is maintained because Pakistani women do not speak up.
And don't just speak out against the bad. If you see positive behavior, make sure it does not go unnoticed and is praised.
3. Don't underestimate the power of social activities
Do you think organizing social activities such as dinners for is just a waste of time? Not if you know the reality of the Pakistani community here in America.
While most Pakistani women have families they can easily turn to for company and support, there are many who don't. Our communities have plenty of women who are new to the country, students from abroad, or those who recently immigrated here with their families but who are hungry for companionship.
Organizing weekly dinners, teas, Islamic classes in Urdu are all small practical steps that Pak-American women can take to help each other not only cope with loneliness, but more importantly become closer to Allah, if He wills. This creates a much-needed social network.
4. Go into professions that are needed in the community
Often, we encourage our children to go into professions that are seen as prestigious or that will ensure them financial security. These may not, however, be professions that are most needed by the Pakistani or Pak-American community. Identify what the needs are and encourage young women to pursue careers in these fields.
For example, there is dire need for Muslim Pakistani social workers, therapists, family counselors, and other support resources. The shortage of such professional skills within the community forces Pak-Americans to go to those who are often insensitive to our values.
Another field where Pakistani women are needed is law. Marriage, divorce, custody of children, and inheritance are all issues which directly affect Muslim women, and for which they will rarely find a Muslim advocate. There is a need for Pakistani women who know Islamic law and the local law to help women deal with issues like these with sincere, sound advice, as well as sympathetic support.
Is there a Pakistani woman doctor in the house? For the most part, the answer is no. It is no cliche to say that there is a crying need for women in the medical field. Women are especially needed in sensitive fields like obstetrics and gynecology, fertility specialists, etc.
These are among many areas where women, especially Pakistani ones, feel most comfortable discussing exclusively with other women who will understand where they are coming from.
5. Teach Urdu and Islamic studies at weekend schools
Does getting an education degree sound too far-fetched? If so, consider helping Pakistanis in America by teaching at the local Islamic weekend school. This is where a number of Muslim kids (most of whom attend public school) find their only Islamic environment throughout the whole week.
The presence Muslim women as mentioned above, is not just in imparting knowledge but it's also in being a positive role model.
As well, teaching in Islamic weekend schools provides you with the opportunity to clarify the position of women in Islam, to clear it of the cultural baggage so many Muslim parents tend to pass down to their kids.
Teaching Urdu on the weekends is also a great way to pass on a part of our Pakistani heritage to the next generation. There are too few young Pak-Americans who know how to read and write Urdu, let alone speak it. Don't let one of Pakistan's official languages die out!
6. Promote and appreciate Pakistani women doing good work
How many of us spend time to appreciate the Pakistani women are doing for positive change in the country or in our local communities?
Whether it's a woman who has given an inspiring speech, written a useful article, established a fantastic program for women in Pakistan or locally at the mosque, a number of Pakistani women tend to beat each other down instead of trying to build each other up.
Promoting and appreciating women who are doing good work will not only serve as encouragement for them, it will also pinpoint acceptable role models for young Pak-American women.
7. Support Pak-American women in need or difficulty
Do you know a woman who takes care of her own kids, plus an ailing mother-in-law? Or someone who needs a night out with her husband after a frustrating week juggling work and home responsibilities? Give her a break. Offer to babysit for a night, or take her kids to the park so she can have some free time to herself. These small gestures give a big boost to sisterhood, not to mention support for a Pakistani family.
8. Teach Pak-American women how to deal with discrimination
How many women know how to respond effectively to discrimination and harassment? It seems that most will tend to ignore it. Others may respond with a rude remark of their own. But neither of these approaches is usually appropriate.
You can help here by developing an effective strategy in consultation with community leaders. Informing and enabling women on how to seek legal recourse if they so choose is another needed service.
9. Become journalists and media professionals
Do you think the ability to write well and communicate effectively has no effect on others?
You're wrong. A knowledgeable, Muslim Pakistani woman who can write and speak well is a powerful weapon in educating the Pak-American community about women's issues. She can also bring to the forefront women's issues in Pakistan and encourage others to help.
10. Use what you have
If you're already a working woman, how can you contribute without necessarily changing careers? Use your professional skills for the community.
If you can write well, establish a well-written, organized and attractive community newsletter. If you're in business, establish a community fundraising project a project helping women in Pakistan. Use what you've got. It'll take some thinking and planning, but you're almost bound to find a way you can contribute, if Allah wills.

source: www.yespakistan.com

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